For many married men, an unconscious thing happens over the years. It happened to me in my marriage. You work hard in your career. You try to be good to your kids. But over time, you and your wife drift apart. And in time, you lose her. You essentially become roommates. Do you feel like roommates with your wife? No […]
It’s a silent epidemic. Guys getting beat up in their marriages. Trounced emotionally and verbally. It happens behind closed doors. Of course, it does. It doesn’t fit the politically correct public narrative of men as perpetrators, so it stays under the lid. Are you getting beat up in your marriage? It’s also concealed because guys want it that way. As […]
“I don’t put the dishes away. “I don’t spend enough time with the kids. “She doesn’t feel like I’m on her team. “It’s endless. Sometimes I wonder why she even stays married to me,” Jack says. Does your wife complain about you? “Why does she stay married to you? Have you asked her?” I say. Jack takes a deep breath. […]
“She has no idea how hard I work.” Robert, a seven-figure tech entrepreneur, shakes his head. “Does she think I slave away all day just for me? “I want all the wonderful things that she wants. In fact, I love providing for her. But damn if…” He pauses, thinks. “Ok, fine, she’s made it clear, I need to show up […]
Fear. It shows up often in relationship. I hear a lot of men saying things like… I fear her anger. Or, I fear I’ll never be enough for her. I also hear, I fear she’ll never want to have sex again. I fear that if I try to talk about it, she’s gonna blow up at me. Do you have […]
I remember 8 years ago, I first started asking the question. It was in my kitchen where I was washing the dishes in my suburban house in Boulder, CO. Feeling quite desperate and overwhelmed with everything in my life – from running my business, helping run a household, raising a son, and all the other stuff that comes with it. […]
William is a high-powered exec in his day job but a humiliated servant at home. His wife steamrolls over him when it comes to just about anything. On top of that, she wants him to step up and be more manly. And while he has a sense of what it means to be more “manly,” he wonders, how the hell […]
This is firsthand. I’ve been there. The brutal nature of feeling like the one person – your wife or partner – to whom you’ve limited your sexuality has closed the door on that part of your life. She’s no longer interested in sex. She says she can’t be physically intimate if she doesn’t first feel emotionally connected. Or she just […]
Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. Ever heard the expression? If so, then you may understand like my client Mauricio did, that in relationship, the saying applies doubly so. Mauricio would get into an argument with his wife and then for hours afterward, he would beat himself up. He’d spiral into fear about how his wife would deprive him of […]
Jim was a high-powered business guy. He had a talent for making big deals happen. He was a rock star at work but man, did he get his boat rocked when it came to his marriage. Do you experience success at work but failure in your marriage? For my client Jim, that was a clear yes. At work, he had […]
