Tag: men’s work

The Hatchet or The Scalpel?

A man knows he has to get out of his marriage, change it, do something. And yet he does nothing; fear cripples him. Is this man you? This man is divided. He fears the fallout of change but knows he must make change. He works with me. We go deep into his fears. We create a path forward in which he can honor […]

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This Is A Man’s World (Is It Really?)

“This is a man’s world,” James Brown sang 54 years ago in his iconic 1966 ballad, “It’s A Man’s Man’s Man’s World.” That’s right. The Godfather of Soul. This is a man’s world, this is a man’s world But it wouldn’t be nothing, nothing without a woman or a girl. Brown goes on about the inventions man made, from cars […]

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The Feminine In The Masculine

“The feminine in a man?” A big burly man says. His massive biceps dwarf his muscle shirt, as he lifts at the gym. “Ha, you got to be kidding me. Next thing you know, you’ll be asking me to be join the knitting club.” “That manly man ain’t so manly,” another man says, “if he’s afraid of his heart.” Ok, […]

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Be Right or Be Loved?

There’s one question that disarms couples in a moment of conflict. Prefer to watch me present live? The Conflict  John and Susan zoom in to me on video chat from South Carolina. John’s a high level executive with a steel company. And while he spends a lot of time at work, he’s aging and well aware that his home life […]

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Men, Tears, & Strength

A man cries. Something opens up in him. He can’t hold in his pain anymore. His heart hurts. His wife has left him. Or he has left her. Either way, he grieves. Men cry. I see this often in my work. Contrary to common belief, they are strong men. Very strong. Strong enough to… Access their sadness. Trust others to […]

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Focus On The Repair, Not The Damage

The Ideal Relationship — What’s it look like? Have you ever been in one?  When I’ve asked clients, they’ve said things like: We’re deeply connected. We stay open to one another. We never fight. Notice the last statement. Do you know couples who never fight? Anyone come to mind? Likely not. How about we change that last statement to “we navigate […]

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I Trust You To Keep Me Safe

“There’s this thing,” a client says to me. Mark looks up to the heavens, as if he’ll find the word there. He’s 51. “It’s happening with me and Felicia. I’m not sure what to call it. It’s… a lining up of sorts. Love… and yet something else…” He looks up again. “It’s like she knows what I’m thinking. Not like […]

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Unlock Your Precious Heart

To the parts of you that fear being seen. Come with me. I will free you. Lead you home. Be your beacon. Be your light. I will see you. Who speaks? When you go deep into your heart… When you touch the place within… Where you are no longer willing to hide? When your heart aches to be heard… When you withhold your precious you… […]

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The Darkness In Me & How It Affects My Relationship

A share like this is vulnerable for me.  I’m not the type to seek personal support online. And yet I seek connection, more than support. I was in a really dark place, about 10 days ago. Anxiety, panic, depression. A sense of the bottom torn out from under me. A hysterical undercurrent of – Would I live? I’m undergoing a […]

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Sovereignty: The Key To A Great Relationship

Sovereignty — I talk a lot about it. It’s the crux of my own personal path. It’s what we seek in a partner, often not even knowing it.  “He’s his own man.” “She’s a powerhouse.” “You really know how to love.” It’s that sense of being with someone solid, grounded, and consistent. We know where we stand. We can relax […]

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