Every month I hear from several dozen men struggling in their marriage or relationship. They say things like… “I don’t feel close to my wife.” “I’m not happy with my marriage.” “I don’t feel like I can meet her needs.” Do you struggle to meet your partner’s needs? When it comes to your partner’s needs, I offer a huge distinction […]
Ten years ago, I was 44 years old, married 17 years, with a 15-year-old son. I’d been through many death and life cycles in my marriage. I was about to go through another one. My wife and I were in the kitchen, talking about what we should get my son for Christmas. She asked for my opinion. I brought my […]
“Happy wife, happy life.” “It’s your job to make her happy.” “If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” No doubt you’ve heard one or all of these expressions. Maybe one of these voices lives in your head. How do you make your wife happy? Every month I talk to guys who approach their marriage as a “wife happy-making” endeavor. They […]
Below is a letter a married man struggling with “not enoughness” sent to his wife recently, inspired by a video of mine. Dear Cindy*, There is something that has been weighing on my heart that I want to share with you. I often find myself grappling with the feeling that I’m not enough for you. Yes, it relates to our […]
“Why do you write about sex so much?” My client Jeff recently asked me. I thought about it for a moment, realizing that what seemed obvious to me wasn’t to him. “In 15 years of coaching men in relationship, so many are feeling deprived of touch and physical intimacy in their marriages. And… that was once my story, so I […]
Sex. It should be simple. It should be clean. She should just want you. And yet when she doesn’t, you can feel a ton of rejection, a sense of desperation, and like you’re screwed – no pun intended. Do you experience sexual rejection from your wife or partner? Or maybe you just don’t get enough sex? A mentor of mine, […]
Most of us have our own version of this story. Do you? You met your wife x number of years ago. At first, it was great. Sweet connection. Wonderful sex. The urge to merge. You got engaged and then married. And then you had a family and things changed over time. You were no longer each other’s priority. Kids came. […]
Ok, I know, another email about the 1 thing on this or the #1 thing on that. We’re inundated by it all the time. And so forgive me for the clickbait title. But this one really is a game-changer. Something big that I’ve consistently seen in 15 years of coaching men in relationship that blows apart marriage after marriage when […]
She talks. I listen. She talks some more. I listen some more. On a good day, her words are about someone or something else and I can help her figure things out. On a bad day, her words are about me and what I don’t do right and what I do wrong. I want to do better but after a […]
“You don’t hear me.” “Why don’t you take me seriously?” “You don’t listen.” Does your wife say any of these things to you? It’s not uncommon for a guy to hear something similar from his wife. And there’s a good reason why. As men, we often struggle to keep up with our partner’s words. We feel like she’s verbose and […]
